I have always had a love affair with what will be known from this day forward as “S,” in the spirit of my current trashy-good tv obsession. Sugar and me, we go way back. This relationship turned sour my freshman year of college, and downright abusive when I was diagnosed with pernicious anemia. Don’t believe me? See for yourself how S can break your heart, among other things.
My anemia diagnosis and subsequent withdrawal from college marks the start of my quest to rebuild my iron stores and get my health on the right track through dietary modification and positive lifestyle changes. Sounds hard and boring, doesn’t it? I mean, S and I had some good times. He was always there when I was stressed, lonely, bored, happy… okay, so I’d use any excuse to turn to him. But I’d had enough of his games and wanted to end things once and for all. And so I picked up a copy of my mother’s old Protein Power book, out of desperation for finding the magical secret to breaking off with S. Lo and behold, I had an epiphany, courtesy of the Doctors Eades. I was not in control of my diet – it was controlling me! After much googling and message board trolling, I found others who had also been treated poorly at the hands of S. He is destroying the self-esteem of millions of americans and even more heinous, contributing to the vanity sizing trend of my favorite retailers. I have five different pants sizes because he is sneaking his way into our diets with every lid peeled off a yogurt container and box top for education clipped. At first I despaired. How could I just quit my dependence on him cold turkey, and turn my back on the foods that had sustained me for my first 19 years of life? S had been with me through thick and thin. And yet it needed to be done. I needed to start liking real food, real fast, or risk not having my own teeth by the age of 50.
Fast forward to now, at the end of what would have been my fourth semester of college circumstances permitting, and I am enjoying spicy sesame chicken with broccoli that did not come from .1# WOK. As annoying as it is sometimes to make everything from scratch with real ingredients, it has had a profound impact on everything from my energy levels to my skin to my comfort level in a bikini. If a junk food junkie like me can completely eliminate sugar and gluten from her diet without going nuts and burning down a bakery, so can you. You just have to be armed with the tools and the will to fail… a lot. And try again. And screw up, then get back on plan. And cave into the temptation of a cookie dough blizzard, then… what I’m trying to say is it isn’t easy to totally cut things off with S, but it can be done. Don’t shoot for perfection–shoot for positive choices, one baby step at a time. So what are you waiting for? Start healing with your next meal. It make take more effort than swiping your student ID card, but it will taste and feel a lot better than that pop-tart from the vending machine.
Come on now honey, bring it on bring it on yeah!
~The Dandy Worhols